The Second Hand Unwinds
by Bakaness
Summary: My first fanfic ever, and also my longest (not that that's saying much.) A slightly AU, OOC look into Akane's mind, and what happens when her strength runs out. Probably my angstiest piece as well. REVIEW PLEASE! *chibi eyes* Pretty please with a naked bi


The Second Hand Unwinds  
  
By Bakaness  
  
Author's Notes: This is my first fanfic. Be gentle. CC is greatly appreciated. Be as picky as you like. E-mail me at: bakanarie@hotmail.com  
  
italics Means thoughts. italics Means thoughts within thoughts. (You'll understand in a minute.) ~…~ Are actions, sounds, and actions within thoughts. […] Are stage directions. //…// Are subtitles.  
  
WARNING: Slightly dim in places, WAFFy in others, but generally non- depressing. (For all of you who, like me, despise sad stories.) Also, OOCness with a few people… mostly our dear Tachi.  
  
Disclaimer: Everyone knows that the Ranma ½ bunch don't belong to me, they belong to the genius Takahashi Rumiko-sama. I don't claim any of them, except for Matsuko, who is my creation, and I'll give all the others back, promise. (Not Ryouga though. He's my favourite. 0;) ) The song "Time After Time" is by Cyndi Lauper.  
  
Note: This is not a story glorifying suicide, but celebrating survival, for not all of us are able to crawl our way out of depression.  
  
  
  
Akane closed her dairy and got up from where she was lying on her bed. How should I do it? Should I slash my wrists? Or maybe I should hang myself. Drowning? Drugs? Hmmm… seppuku IS the traditional way of martial artists. I might not have anyone to remove my head for me, but I can come pretty close by myself. If no one will acknowledge that I'm a martial artist in life, I'll force them to say that I died like one. She smiled, a small, sad, ironic smile. I'll get to see ka-san again…  
  
Akane walked through the empty house to the dojo, where various family heirlooms were proudly displayed. Removing the tanto that had been given to her at birth from the wall, she studied it intently, rubbing her fingers over the scabbard and hilt of the blade. She drew it, and tested it for sharpness. She smiled when it drew blood. Thank Kami-sama tou-san is obsessive about keeping knives sharp. I should be good and dead before anyone gets home. Kasumi is at the market; she won't be back for hours. Nabiki is undoubtedly separating fools from their money, and tou-san and Saotome-ojisan are at a shogi tournament and will be out all night celebrating. And Ranma… Ranma is gone. Nobody will be home before dinner.  
  
Akane returned to her room, changed into her best gi, brushed her hair, and took a brush, paper, and ink down to the dojo. Once there, she wrote a note to her family in her best calligraphy. She knelt in the centre of the dojo, facing the shrine, and took a deep breath, while tucking the top half of her gi under her legs to support her, so that she would fall forward, as if someone was waiting to remove her head. Humph. This really WAS designed for males. She thought, glancing down at her modest sports bra and bare midriff. I'll really miss this place. She smiled sadly, and took a last look around the dojo. "This will be the second time I'll die like Juliet. Her last words are fitting, don't you think? O happy dagger! This is thy sheath; there rust, and let me die." She gripped the tanto and, with a sigh, embedded it to the hilt in her stomach, sliding it along the line of her left rib to her solar plexus. How strange… it hardly hurts at all… She thought with a small smile, before she collapsed forward, and the world faded to black.  
  
  
  
Meanwhile, Ranma was dithering outside the front door of the Tendo residence, wondering whether he should to enter. Maybe I should give them more time to recover before I apologize.  
  
You mean show your face.  
  
Shut up! Wait a sec… who the hell are you and what are you doing in my head?!?  
  
Remember that cursed spring you fell into?  
  
How could I forget?  
  
I'm the girl that drowned in it.  
  
Huh?  
  
When I drowned, my soul was trapped in that spring.  
  
Oh... Ummm… so, what's your name?  
  
My name's Matsuko. My friends call me Matty.  
  
Ok… Matty?  
  
Who said you could call me Matty???  
  
Matsuko?  
  
Yes?  
  
BUTT OUT!  
  
Sorry. No can do. For the past year and a half I've been stuck here with nothing to do besides listen to your, VERY FEW, thoughts. Now I've decided to help you before you decide to screw up OUR life anymore than you already have.  
  
SINCE WHEN IS IT _OUR_ LIFE?! AND _MY_ LIFE IS NOT SCREWED UP!! Well, maybe a little…  
  
Stop dithering and get in there you idiot. BOYS ARE SOOOOO STUPID!!  
  
I AM NOT STUPID!!!!!!!  
  
MOVE IT!!!!  
  
All right already! Sheesh…  
  
"Hello?! Anybody home? Guess not. While turning to leave, his pigtail stood on end as his famous danger sense kicked in. Akane! With silence born of long practice, he ran up to Akane's room and carefully opened the door. Empty. He checked the kitchen. Empty. Finally, he ran to the dojo. He gingerly slid open the door, not sure if he would like what he found. He didn't. Akane was sprawled on the floor of the dojo; her back turned to him. He dashed to her side, and was nearly sick when he saw that she was lying in a pool of her own blood. "No." He breathed. "NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He screamed, scaring the birds out of the trees. As he bent to pick her up, he noticed a slip of paper in her hand. "What the…?"  
  
"Dear Daddy, Kasumi, Nabiki, P-chan, Dr. Tofu, Uncle Genma, Sayuri, Yuka, Auntie Nodoka, Ryouga, Mousse, Shampoo, Ukyou, Ranma.  
  
"I apologize for having caused you all so much pain in the past. This is the best way I know of to end that sorrow. I realize that some of you may feel some minor grief over my death, and for that I apologize. That pain will pass quickly and you will realize that this is the best thing for everyone. It is my time to leave this world. I am sorry I was such a pest and a burden to everyone while I was alive, I hope my death will demonstrate my regret. I wish you all every happiness and blessing in your lives. I shall miss you all,  
  
Akane.  
  
Ranma paled, and the hands that held the note shook. Akane… How could you think that? How could you want to die? I can't let you die. I won't! "AKANE!!!!!!" Ranma screamed, again. As the echoes faded, Ranma folded the note, put it in his pocket, then tenderly picked Akane up, and ran with her in his arms to Dr. Tofu's, not noticing the tears that trickled down his cheeks and his that shirt was soaking up Akane's blood.  
  
  
  
"Doc! Doc! You gotta help Akane!" Bellowed Ranma as he burst through the door.  
  
"Place her on the table, please Ranma. What happened?"  
  
"She tried to commit suicide!" Ranma thrust the note at Dr. Tofu, who quickly scanned it before attending to Akane.  
  
"The tanto, luckily, has missed the most vital organs, but there is a lot of internal damage and she has lost a lot of blood." As he spoke, the doctor hit various pressure points on her body. "That should slow the bleeding, but we have to get her to the hospital. Do you know of anything that could have caused Akane to do this?" Leaving that question hanging, Dr. Tofu turned and called for an ambulance. Meanwhile, Ranma paled, sweat- dropped, and looked like sheer willpower was the only thing keeping him from fainting, totally unnoticed by everything except for a few dust mites and a fly on the wall, none of whom were very interested anyway.  
  
  
  
[Enter Kuno Tatewaki, stage left.] "Where art thou, Oh Beauteous and Beloved Tendo Akane? I, Kuno Tatewaki, Blue Thunder of Furinkan High, have come to Offer Condolences in thine Time of Unmentionable Anguish that led you to thine Fortunately Failed attempt to Honourably End thine Life!" Ranma groaned at the sound of Kuno's excessively loud pontificating. In his head, Matsuko could be heard gagging.  
  
"Put a sock in it, will ya? This is a hospital. People are trying to get better here, and Akane's sleeping."  
  
"Thou art a Vile Cur Saotome! I shall Smite™ thee… anon." He then produced two large bouquets of crimson roses and, being surprisingly quiet, set one in a vase on Akane's bedside table, and the other to Ranma. "For my Osage no Onna, tell her, I, Kuno Tatewaki, Blue Thunder of Furinkan High, shall Release her from thine Villainous Clutches."  
  
"Groovy. Now say it in a language I can understand."  
  
Kuno sighed and massaged his temples. "Just give the red-head the flowers and tell her I sent them, capice[i]?"  
  
"Capice."  
  
Since when do you speak Italian? You've never been outside of Asia!  
  
I saw "The Godfather"  
  
"I have also taken the liberty of sending my raving lunatic of a sister to Brazil for a Martial Arts Gymnastics tournament to allow the heavenly Tendo Akane to recover without fear of poisoning." Kuno shuddered. "Or that laugh… Anyway, she should be gone for at least two months." Ranma stared, his jaw on the floor. Kuno seemed to be quasi-sane.  
  
Naah… not possible. If Kuno's sane then P-chan can fly.  
  
A wise man names not the wells from which he will not drink.  
  
What the hell are you on about?  
  
Look out the window.  
  
?  
  
Do a Nike, Just Do It™. At that moment, P-chan came hurtling past the window, which was rather bizarre because the window was 10 stories above the ground, before he landed in the hospital pool with a large splash. Ranma facefaulted, while outside Ukyou looked sheepish for a second, then ran to rescue Ryouga before he could get lost, again. Kuno just looked confused, and slipped back into his "stuffed moron" mode. "Just when One Believes that One's Life cannot become more Peculiar, Circumstance proves Otherwise." Kuno muttered to himself, shaking his head. "Flying pigs! 'Tis true that Extraordinary Happenings occur around the Nefarious Sorcerer." [Exit Kuno, stage left]  
  
Weird. Defiantly weird.  
  
You can say that again.  
  
Weird. Defiantly weird.  
  
I didn't mean literally, baka.  
  
"Bwee bwee bukee bukee bwee bwee bukee!!!!! (Ranma! Prepare to die! In pig.)  
  
"Knock it off P-chan. I'm not in the mood." With that, Ranma poured water from a conveniently available kettle onto Ryouga.  
  
"Ranma! What did you do to Akane THIS time!?!" Silently, Ranma handed his best enemy the note, not even slightly amused as Ryouga turned white. Matsuko, however, was in heaven, and dribbling madly in Ranma's mind.  
  
Wow. Cute! Wow. Cute! Wow. Cute! Wow. Cute! Wow. Cute! Wow. Etc. Ranma rolled his eyes. GIRLS! He thought with a mental sigh.. Fortunately for him, Matsuko was far too dumbstruck to punish him for that sexist thought.  
  
"No. Oh SHIT! Damn." With that, Ryouga decided to bang his head against the wall. The wall, however, didn't like this, since Ryouga's head was as hard as a rock and was cracking the poor, defenseless wall. "What's up Pork- breath?"  
  
"It's my fault. It's all my fault."  
  
"How do you figure that?"  
  
"Ranma, she knows. She found out a few days ago."  
  
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE KNOWS?!?!?!?!"  
  
"Ssssssssshhhhhhhhhhh!!! Keep your voice down! I'll explain later. I'd… I'd better go." Ryouga then proceeded to retrieve his clothes from his backpack, which he had pulled from Hammerspace™, and got dressed[ii], much to Matsuko's extreme disappointment. That done, he left. A few minutes later, he was still attempting to leave, so Ranma took his arm and guided him through the door, down the corridor, and into the lift. Hopefully, he could find his own way out of THAT when it got to the ground floor.  
  
  
  
A few more minutes later, Nabiki, Kasumi, Soun, and Genma entered the hospital room. Soun, predictably, was crying a #352: "my baby girl is in the hospital because she tried to commit suicide." Genma was a panda, which had earned the group some VERY strange looks as they walked though the hospital; Kasumi looked worried, and Nabiki… Nabiki… looked like she had been crying, but she had regained her usual composure. Ranma promptly left to give them some privacy. On his way out, he was stopped by Nabiki. "You'll pay for this, Saotome Ranma, if it's the last thing I do." She hissed.  
  
  
  
That afternoon, Ranma was sitting on the roof of the Tendo dojo, doing something he is not often credited with the ability to do: thinking. Why would she do something like that?  
  
I'd say she was depressed. That's normally why people attempt suicide. Wouldn't you be depressed if you were her?  
  
What has she got to be depressed about? She's got a family who love her, friends, a home… Ranma sighed.  
  
Maybe she keeps a diary. You should check.  
  
Are you sure that's a good idea? If she finds out, she'll be FURIOUS!  
  
And what happens when she gets back from the hospital? Unless the problem is fixed, she'll try to kill herself the next chance she gets, and she'll probably get it right. You don't want that to happen, do you?  
  
Of course not! But do you have any idea what she'll do to me if she ever finds out? Ranma flinched as pictures of an Akane that looked so evil that Satan himself would run away screaming for his mother, and doing unspeakably painful things to him.  
  
She can't do that if she never finds out.  
  
I guess you're right.  
  
I'm always right.  
  
I'll never get any peace of mind if I don't.  
  
You have a mind???  
  
If I don't, how can I be talking to you?  
  
Point… Point.  
  
Having made his decision, Ranma walked to a spot on the roof directly above Akane's window and flipped down into the bedroom.  
  
You couldn't have taken the door?  
  
No. It takes too long and somebody might have seen me if I went that way. Ummm… where would Akane keep her diary?  
  
~ She sighed. ~ Has being a girl taught you nothing? Give me the body.  
  
How do I do that?  
  
Just relax and let me do it. A strange tingle went through his body, then Ranma-chan started to stretch. "It feel so good to have a body again."  
  
Hey! When did I get wet?*  
  
You didn't. Excuse me for wanting to be in my old body.  
  
Jeez Matsuko, why are you so sensitive?  
  
I'm not! You're just an insensitive jerk with a room temperature IQ![iii]  
  
I am not!  
  
You're SOOOO STUPID you probably don't even know what it means!!! ~ She pulls a stand-up fan from mental Hammerspace™ and proceeds to beat the mental Ranma into a greasy spot. ~  
  
You're as bad as Akane!  
  
Just shut up and let me do this!  
  
Fine!  
  
"I have NO idea why she puts up with him. He is such a moron." Ranma-chan, a.k.a. Matsuko, Matty to her friends, muttered a few swearwords under her breath to help clarify her point. She quickly checked all the usual girl's hiding spots[iv] and found the diary. Got it! ~ She sighed. ~ You can have your body back now. Ranma looked down at himself, did a perfect double take, and went into total mind meltdown. B… b… but… h… h… how?  
  
Magic you moron! MOVE IT BEFORE WE GET CAUGHT!!! NOW!!! Ranma jumped out of the window, narrowly missing the pond, for a change, and got the hell outta there before anyone noticed him.  
  
  
  
Up in a tree, somewhere on the outskirts of Tokyo, Ranma looked around. Good. I'm alone…  
  
Hey! What am I? Chopped liver?  
  
OK… I'm PHYSICALLY alone.  
  
That's better.  
  
That means nobody saw me come here. Somewhere in the distance, a drum rolled, while Ranma opened the book to a random page and began to read.  
  
  
  
Wednesday, August 15  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
Ranma and I had ANOTHER fight today. It seems that's all we ever do. He says something, I get annoyed; he says something else, I get pissed; he opens his mouth again and BOOM! I see red, my body goes on autopilot, and his body goes flying. I HATE this. I hate being angry, but the more I hate it, the more often I get angry. You can probably guess what the fight was about THIS time, Diary. P-chan came home this afternoon, and I was playing with him. He's my pet, what else am I supposed to do? Beat him to a bloody pulp? Ranma, as always, started with his rude, sarcastic comments about P-chan. He always calls him Ryouga and Ryouga P-chan. How strange. It must be because he thinks Ryouga is reminiscent of a pig Anyway, I was just going to bed and snuggling up to P-chan…"  
  
Why that dirty pig!!!  
  
Calma… calma… One would think that such a good martial artist would have better control over his temper.  
  
SHUT UP! WHAT THE HELL WOULD YOU KNOW ABOUT BEING A MARTIAL ARTIST?!  
  
Why do you think the girl body has been so fit and flexible ever since you got it?  
  
Ummm… I figured it was just me turned female.  
  
Well you figured wrong. I was… No, AM, a martial artist too… and a damned good one at that… before I drowned, that is.  
  
How'd you drown anyway?  
  
It's a long story, and I don't want to talk about it right now.  
  
"…When Ranma sneaked in. I pretended to be asleep so I could find out what he was up to".  
  
She was awake??? I could have sworn she was asleep!  
  
MEN!  
  
???  
  
You're all so unobservant!  
  
I am not! I notice a lot of things about her!  
  
Like what?  
  
Like those beautiful chocolate eyes… or her brilliant smile…  
  
You really like her, huh?  
  
Wait a sec! I never said that!  
  
You don't have to. Don't worry, I won't tell. We girls are good at keeping secrets. You should know, you're ½ of one. ~ He scowled ~ Besides, it's not like I have anyone else to talk to anyway.*  
  
"He tried to boil poor P-chan alive, AGAIN. I wonder why he keeps doing that… Must be some kind of idiosyncrasy he picked up on the road. Predictable me, I started yelling and kicked him into the pond. I hate it when I do that. Every time I throw him out I regret it more and more. I mean, he is kinda hot, though I'd rather die than admit it to anyone, especially him. That over-inflated ego of his would skyrocket. I wonder why Ranma is always trying to douse P-chan with hot water? Never know, there may be some logic behind it. I think I'll give P-chan a nice hot bath tomorrow; I mean, there ARE a lot of weirdoes with Jusenkyo curses running around. Ranma, Shampoo, Mousse, Uncle Genma, Tarou, and who knows who else. A bath won't do him any harm. Goodnight diary."  
  
"Thursday, August 16  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
I'm still in shock. Ryouga is P-chan. P-chan is Ryouga. I've told P-chan some of my deepest secrets; stuff I'd never tell Sayuri and Yuka, and they're my closest friends. He's betrayed me. Oh Kami-sama! I've lost count of all the times Ranma tried to show me. Ryouga explained why Ranma couldn't just tell me; Warrior's Honour. I'm just so… so… hurt that he could do that to me. After I saw him change, I got angrier than I've ever been before."  
  
Wow. I didn't realize that someone could get angrier than she usually gets. Impressive. I bet you 1,000 yen she broke every bone in his body.  
  
You're on.  
  
"It was so strange. It wasn't burning anger, like I usually feel, it was cold. Like I had turned to ice, and all emotion except an overwhelming desire for vengeance had disappeared. I was willing to let him explain, so I could devise an appropriately savage punishment. I still feel like that. I feel like I'll never be happy again. Life without feeling… I don't think I can live like this. I need emotion. It's strange. You never really notice it till it's gone. Maybe I'll feel better in the morning. 'Night Diary."  
  
I don't get it. How can anyone not feel emotions?  
  
Trust me, it's possible. And it's not pleasant. A Heart of Ice[v] is an extremely painful thing to have.  
  
Is it enough to make someone…  
  
It can be, if they're not ready for it or if they're a person who uses their emotions a lot… like Akane. For Nabiki it wouldn't be so bad, because she's always surpressing emotions.  
  
You mean she doesn't already have one?  
  
No. Not by a long shot.*  
  
"Saturday, August 18  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
Just when you think things can't get worse, they do. Yesterday, Ranma and I had this huge fight (by our standards). I was too upset to write. I don't really want to go into details. It followed the typical pattern: He said stuff, I said stuff, I pulled my mallet, Arglefraster, out of Hammerspace™. Then it deviated from the pattern. Instead of me hitting him and sending him flying, he… he… he… he snatched Arg out of my hands and… and… snapped her over his knee. I realize he couldn't have known about the soul-bond, but I just can't get the sound of her screams out of my head. They just keep echoing, 'round and 'round, then that awful silence when she died. I feel even colder than before, like all the colours have seeped out of my world, turning everything gray."  
  
Soul-bond? Nabiki mentioned that, but what the hell is it?  
  
Exactly what it sounds like. The mallet was a semi-sentient being, and they swapped part of their souls. Akane had a piece of Arg's soul, and Arg had a piece of Akane's soul. That enabled her to use Hammerspace™ so easily. When Arg was killed, the piece of Akane's soul Arg had and the piece of Arg's soul she carried were ripped away.  
  
So Akane doesn't have a complete soul? What does she have instead?  
  
Right. Her soul isn't complete, there are voids where it once was. But it will grow back, over time.  
  
So she'll be OK?  
  
If she doesn't kill herself before she has a chance to heal, like she almost did. She'll have to deal with it… and it's about as hard to deal with a sudden loss of part of your soul as it is to deal with the death of a loved one.  
  
How do you know so much about it?  
  
I have been soul-bonded.  
  
To what?  
  
That's kinda personal, but I reckon I'll tell you. A sword, she was called Honour, and a person… a man.  
  
Oh. What happened?  
  
I don't want to talk about it.  
  
Why not?  
  
It's none of your business, and now would be a VERY good time to continue reading… ~ She glared at him, the threat of violence apparent. ~  
  
*Right.*  
  
"Nabiki started screaming at him. She told him to leave, and never come back. To never show his face again. That he was a piece of honourless scum, not fit to be called human, let alone a man. I was still in shock, but I don't think I could have stopped her if I tried. Biki-oneechan can be very possessive, and I've never seen her that angry. I know she's never liked Ranma, but still… she over-reacted. He probably feels horrible now."  
  
She said that???  
  
Yeah.  
  
Oh man. And you decided to show your face? You're a braver person than I thought you were, Saotome Ranma.   
  
Nabiki did the right thing… I shouldn't have gone back, but I had to say goodbye. ~ Matsuko smiled at Ranma~  
  
You did the right thing. If you hadn't, she'd be dead now.  
  
"I wish I could get him to come back. But I can't, I know that. He's probably staying with Ukyou now, I know she'll be more than happy to give him Konatsu's room, if she's not sharing her own. I don't know why I care. Why should I? Since he arrived, my life has been nothing but chaos. Three, if not more, OTHER fiancées hanging around… all right… two and a wannabe. I've been kidnapped by more goons more times than I care to count, almost got cursed as a duck… there's some demon from hell or someplace like it popping up every second week, and when there isn't there's some crazed wacko instead. But now Arg's gone, and I realize all I've ever been is a burden to those I love most. One more person for poor Kasumi to cook for; one more line in Excel™[vi] for Nabiki to balance; one more person for Dad to cry over and worry about; one more person for the other fiancées to get rid of; one more, unwanted, fiancée to loose honour over. Everyone I know would be better off without me… I'd get to see ka-san again…"  
  
How could you think that, Akane? Baka! Can't you see that my life would be so much worse without you??  
  
Ah HA! So you admit it!  
  
Kuso. Gotta remember you can hear everything I think.  
  
~ She smirked. ~ I knew it! You love her, and you know it!  
  
What? That kwaiikune irokegane macho tomboy? No way!  
  
Methinks thou doth protest too much.  
  
You turn into Kuno or something?  
  
~She glared at him.~ You're changing the subject. I'm right, aren't I?  
  
Whatever. I just left because I was kicked out… that and Nabiki looked pretty pissed. I could never HATE her… I don't think anybody sane could.  
  
Since I'm SOOOO right, why are you here and not with her? She should be waking up soon. Ranma jumped down and started running. It was 10 pm when he finally got to Akane's hospital room.  
  
Meanwhile, Akane had been dreaming…  
  
  
  
Where am I? Akane got up and looked around. What is this place? Am I dead?  
  
"You're not dead. This is your Memory Room." A disembodied female voice said. Akane was in a room lined with video-filled shelves and had a large TV with a VCR in the centre of one wall. In the middle of the room was a comfy-looking lounge chain, facing the TV. "Why am I here?"  
  
"Have a seat and I'll show you." As Akane sat down the lights flicked off and the TV screen flickered to life. She saw herself and P-chan… or rather, Ryouga.  
  
  
  
"Here P-chan! Good boy!" Akane picked up her pet and snuggled him close to her chest. "I'm going to give you a nice widdle bath. Would you like that? Hmmm??"  
  
Blech. I think I'm going to be sick. I was so stupid not to see it sooner. Akane no baka!  
  
"P-chan started to struggle wildly to get out of Akane's arms. Completely oblivious, she walked down the corridor and into the Tendo bathroom. She closed the door, making sure her "pet" had no hope of escape. The little pig paled; he was in for the worst beating of his life, and he knew it. Akane stripped, re-captured her oddly nervous piglet, and sat on a stool to bathe. She then stepped into the furo, keeping a tight grip on the pig. "Don't worry P-chan. There's nothing to be afraid of."  
  
Except me and the hot water… how ironic. I think I'm going to be sick.  
  
The camera, if it could be called that, switched to slow motion. Akane, oh- so-agonizingly-slowly dipped P-chan into the water, and watched, dumbstruck, as her adored pet changed colour and grew into a familiar bandannaed boy. She saw the expression on her face shift from shock, to realization, to rage. Her trusty mallet materialized in her hands, and BOOM! One pork okonomiaki for cannibals. The "camera" flipped back to normal speed. "RYOUGA NO HENTAI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Akane grabbed a towel and ran into her room, tears streaming down her face. She collapsed to the floor, sobbing and murmuring "P-chan is Ryouga! Ryouga is P-chan! P- chan is Ryouga! Ryouga is P-chan…"  
  
After what felt like an eternity, she picked herself up, dried her tears, put on her gi, and went to the back of the dojo to turn perfectly functional building materials into fine gravel.  
  
  
  
"Why did you show me that?? I was there, I already knew what happened." Akane asked the air, since there wasn't really anything she could see to address.  
  
"Why are you here?" Came the ghostly female voice.  
  
"That's my question." Akane muttered under her breath. Louder she tried asking another question. "Where am I?"  
  
"You already know the answer to that question. You're in your Memory Room. What's the last thing you remember?"  
  
"Can't you just give me a straight answer for once?!?!?!?"  
  
The voice was silent, and if Akane didn't know better, she'd have sworn that the silence was reprimanding her. "Ummm… Embedding a tanto in my stomach. Oh... So what's going on?"  
  
"Sit down and watch this video."  
  
"No. Why should I? I'm leaving. This place gives me the creeps."  
  
"There's just two more you have to see. The next one's short. Besides, there's no door." The voice seemed smugly amused. Akane most definitely wasn't.  
  
"Fine." She sat back down and another video started playing on the TV. Then Akane saw which one of her memories was playing, and her face turned ashen. "No. Not this one. Please…" She breathed.  
  
  
  
Kimiko Tendo lay upon the hospital bed, her face gaunt with a faint gray tinge; her hands mere bones with some skin stretched over them. "Akane- chan." Mrs. Tendo called in a weak, sand-papery, voice. "Come sit here on my bed a minute." A young Akane trotted up to her mother and jumped to land lightly on the bed by her mother. Kimiko smiled, for her daughter showed promise as a martial artist, even if Kasumi was more likely to take over the dojo. "Akane. I want you to listen very carefully, because I want you to remember this, okay?" Chibi-Akane nodded, her plump face growing serious at her mother's tone. "I'm going to have to go away soon, and I'll be gone a long time."  
  
"Why Ka-san? You could stay here with me an-" Kimiko gently pressed a bony finger against her youngest daughter's lips. "I have to go Ne-chan. Now shh for a moment. I want you to remember that I love you, very much, and I will never be too far away. All you have to do is look up at the moon, and think of me, and I will hear. Can you remember that?"  
  
"Yes Ka-san. But why can't I go with you?"  
  
"You can, but not just yet. First you have to grow and become a big girl, and help your sisters and daddy. Then you have to become all wrinkly, like me. Once you've done that, then you can join me."  
  
"Why not now?"  
  
"Ne-chan, I don't want you coming until you've done everything. But don't worry, I'll always be watching over you. Now, be a good girl and get your Daddy." Chibi-Akane nodded, hugged her mother, and hopped off of the bed and headed out of the room. "I love you Ne-chan." Kimiko called after her daughter.  
  
"I love you too Ka-san." Chibi-Akane walked out of the hospital room, and never saw her mother alive again.  
  
  
  
Akane looked away from the blank screen, tears rolling down her face. "Why did you show me that? Why did I have to see THAT!?"  
  
"You can go back, if you want to. You have a choice now, Akane. You can go back, or you can keep going, and see your Ka-san again."  
  
"Huh?" Akane replied intelligently.  
  
"One more anamnesis, then you decide." The lights went off and the screen flickered back to life.  
  
  
  
It was a hospital, almost identical to the one in the last "video clip," but the people within it were different. Ranma sat by the bed, holding the patient's small hand in both of his. Words started scrolling along the bottom of the screen, while Ranma sat silent, not moving a muscle.  
  
//They're so small. Almost half the size of one of my hands. But they're so strong…// A brief flash of pain for both him and construction materials flashed onto the screen. "Akane." The screen Ranma said softly.  
  
NANI!! Akane's eyes boggled. THAT"S ME!?!?! But… what is he doing in my hospital room? I thought he had left…  
  
"Don't die, ok?" Ranma continued. "We need you… I need you. Come back. Please… If you weren't here, who'd hit me every time I said something stupid? Who else could help me improve my tolerance for bio-hazardous material?"  
  
Akane, who had been smiling softly as she watched, stiffened in anger. "…Sorry. I guess I shouldn't have said that." Ranma continued. Akane relaxed in her chair, surprised. He's never apologized before… but maybe I never really gave him a chance…  
  
"We're all worried about you. Even Shampoo said you shouldn't be lying here, dying." //She also said you should be lying on a battle field, dying from the mortal wounds you had received from her sword, but I guess it's the thought that counts.// "I'm really sorry I left ,I should have stayed and tried to defend myself. I… I… I… like you a lot Akane. And when you smile, well, sometimes you look kinda cute. //Actually, I'm lying. You could never be cute. You're too beautiful fort that…// "Listen to me, I'm starting to sound like Kuno…" He paused, considering. "Nahh, not that bad.[vii] Please… come back Akane. Please…" //Aishiteru.// Ranma stood, kissed Akane softly on the cheek, and slid back down into his seat.  
  
  
  
Akane again wiped tears off her cheeks, but this time she was smiling. "Did… did he really say that?"  
  
"Yes. While you were watching, in fact."  
  
"What were the subtitles?"  
  
"His thoughts."  
  
"Oh… He… thinks I'm… beautiful? THAT'S why he calls me uncute?" Akane paused, and then, when the voice didn't answer, asked another question. "You said there was a way back?"  
  
"Yes, through that door. Have you learnt to swim yet?"  
  
Somehow, Akane wasn't particularly surprised to find the voice knew she couldn't swim. After all, it had shown her some of her most closely guarded memories in Technicolour. "What does swimming have to so with anything?"  
  
"Obviously not. Just stand up and kick, gently. Don't try to break anything."  
  
"Ok…" Where the hell is the door? There was no door last time I checked in fact, the voice said so… "Where's the door?" A big, neon yellow arrow appeared on the screen. It rotated 360 degrees before ending up pointing behind her. She groaned and rolled her eyes. "Take a deep breath. And don't forget what you saw."  
  
"I'll remember." Akane walked to the fluorescent, impossible-to-miss, door. She opened the door, took a deep breath as instructed, and stepped out. She was immediately immersed a warm darkness, one that she couldn't breathe. Remembering her instructions, she slowly began moving her legs, moving towards a faint glow far above her head. Back in the mysterious TV room, the voice sighed. "Good bye Ne-chan. I love you. Please…. don't make the same mistake I did…. Cherish your time together." With those words, the room faded out of existence and the voice returned from whence it came.  
  
  
  
An eternity later, Akane opened her eyes and blinked, trying to focus them. What a strange dream. I dreamed I was in this TV room, then in a hospital? Weird. As her eyes focused, Akane began to slowly move her head to look around, then did a double-take as she recognized where she was. In a hospital room, with Ranma sitting beside her, her left hand in both of his. The one difference from her dream was that Ranma was asleep, a small frown on his face. He's pretty cute when he's asleep…  
  
Ranma was dozing, images of Akane floating through his mind. Akane wounded, her blood on his hands. Akane crying like her heart was breaking, and then thrusting a dagger through her heart. Akane drowning, calling to him for help, and him not being able to reach her. Akane pale, lying with her hands crossed over her chest, lying in a oak coffin. Akane's name written on the family tomb beside her mother's…  
  
He was brought out of his nightmares by a gentle hand squeezing his. He opened his eyes, and stared at Akane's face, her deep brown eyes open and lucid once more, her lips smiling, at him, for once. Relief flooded his features. "Akane! You're awake!"  
  
"I'd noticed." She replied with mild sarcasm. "How long have I been… asleep?"  
  
"Since this morning…" He looked at his watch. "Yesterday morning, now."  
  
"Why am I still alive?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"I should have died. I planned it so that I'd be dead long before anybody found me… Why am I here, instead of a cozy grave?"  
  
"I… uh… I found you."  
  
"But… why were you there? I was told you were disowned, that you were never going to return… Why didn't you? Why are you here?" Ranma felt stung by that remark, and was about to give an angry retort when a familiar voice in his head stopped him. She's tired, drugged, confused, depressed, and in a state of shock. Give the girl a break. Ranma realized the logic of Matty's comment, and instead said the first excuse that came to mind. "I… um… forgot to pack my… scarf. Yeah. My scarf." No one ever accused Ranma of being a good liar. You honestly expect her to believe THAT??? That is the most pathetic excuse for a lie I have EVER heard anyone have the temerity to use![viii]  
  
You said it yourself, she's drugged, depressed, confused, and tired. It's worth a shot.  
  
"I wasn't born yesterday Ranma. Do you really expect me to believe THAT?"  
  
"Um… not really?"  
  
Akane smiled. "Right. Not really. But thanks."  
  
"For what?" Now it was Ranma's turn to be confused.  
  
"Saving my life… again."  
  
"No sweat. Just… I don't want to have to do it again, okay?"  
  
"Okay. C'mere."  
  
What in all the Chinese Hells is she DOING?  
  
~ Matty just stood there, grinning from pointed-ear to pointed-ear. ~ You'll find out soon enough...  
  
Ranma bent closer to Akane's face, unconsciously noting the uncommon pallor of her skin.  
  
Akane, dredging up her last ounce of strength[ix], reached up with both hands and pulled Ranma's head towards hers before he had time to react, and kissed him, firmly and thoroughly, before letting him go again. She then started grinning at his gazelle-in-headlights expression, but sobered when he snapped out of his daze.  
  
NANI!! What the…?? Ranma thought as Akane grabbed his head. Then he realized, and panic conquered his thoughts. She's KISSING me! Why is she kissing me? What do I do? If I pull away, she'll KILL me! … Hang on, this is rather nice… very nice, in fact… With that thought firmly planted in his head, Ranma began to kiss her back uncertainly. Finally, Akane broke the kiss, leaving him dumbfounded. When he finally shook himself out of it, he found her warm brown eyes looking up at him seriously. "Ranma. I'm… sorry… about what I said. I shouldn't have pushed you and I shouldn't have lost my temper like that. Can you forgive me?"  
  
"You didn't even have to ask."  
  
  
  
Ranma and Akane were in the dojo, sparring. "Come on! Fight back for once, damn you!"  
  
Ranma sighed in exasperation. "Look, 'Kane, I already told you. I don't fight girls." He explained in a reasonable tone.  
  
"Why the hell not?"  
  
"I just… don't. OK?"  
  
"You've fought Kodachi, and Azusa, and Shampoo, AND Ukyou, so WHY WON'T YOU FIGHT ME!?!"  
  
Ranma lost his cool at this point. "Because you're a weakling who couldn't hold her own against ANYone who's ANY good at the Art! That's why!" That was, of course, EXACTLY the wrong thing to say. Ranma had a knack for that.  
  
"KISAMA!" WHAM! The floor now had a large dent in it where Akane had hit it instead of Ranma. WHAM! WHAM! WHAM! Four dents. "If you won't fight then STAY STILL!!!"  
  
Ranma finally ran out of patience. "Fine! You asked for it!" He jumped and side-kicked Akane in the abdomen while wrenching the mallet from her grip. Akane doubled over, clutching her stomach, and gasped for breath, winded. She looked up in time to see Ranma, fed up with being hit by that blasted mallet, break it over his knee. There was a sudden flash of light and Akane collapsed to the floor, screaming like a wild thing in agony. Shit! I didn't hit her that hard… did I? I pulled my blow! At that moment the rest of the Tendo household crashed into the dojo, brought by the horrible screams. "Oh My!!!" Kasumi gasped and rushed to her sister's side with the large first aid kit, and when she found no external injury, she began rocking Akane in her arms and murmuring to her, trying to calm her down. Meanwhile, Soun and Genma were screaming at Ranma, one about what he did to his little girl, and the other about his lack of honour for hitting a girl. Nabiki stood in the doorway, silent, but staring at Ranma with eyes full of accusation. Ranma ignored them, and walked over to Kasumi. Akane had stopped screaming, but she was muttering something, over and over again. "Dead. She's dead. He killed her. She's dead…"  
  
"Kasumi?" Ranma ventured? "What happened?"  
  
"I think I can answer that for you." Nabiki piped up. "You just broke Akane's mallet." Ranma looked at her, his face a total blank of incomprehension. "Have you ever heard the legend of Miyagi Shiori?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Legend says that Miyagi Shiori, back in the time of the first founding of Japan, was a fierce warrior. A run-away vortex sucked her into the Mallet- dimension while on a mission to escort ambassadors through disputed territory. She helped the people there gain freedom from the shadow-beings that oppressed them, and the rulers of that dimension decided to reward her for her bravery. They declared that she and all of her female descendants would be Bonded to the magical mallets from that dimension, so that they would never be in wont of a weapon. Since then, all of her daughters have formed a soul-bond with a mallet strong enough to cross the boundaries of space-time and call it to herself."  
  
Ranma blinked. "Nice story. What's that got to do with anything? She's a Tendo."  
  
"Our mother's maiden name was Miyagi Kimiko."  
  
"Oh. So you're telling me that that story is true? No way! You and Kasumi can't produce mallets!"  
  
In response, a mallet shimmered to life in Nabiki's hands. Turning, he saw Kasumi call one into being as well. "You just broke an extremely strong soul-bond. Akane is suffering from the backlash of having a piece of her soul ripped out in an instant." Nabiki almost spat the words at him, her eyes flashing in anger. "Because of you, Akane will be like this until enough of her soul re-grows to allow her to function. Get out."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Leave. Go. Do not show your face here again."  
  
"But…" Ranma looked around at the cold, closed faces around him. "Oyagi? Tendo-san?" Ranma looked about him for an ally against Nabiki's cold fury.  
  
Soun managed to stop sobbing long enough to fix Ranma with an angry glare. "From now on, the engagement is nullified. I no longer wish you to marry any of my daughters."  
  
"You have dishonoured the Saotome clan. I have no son." Genma turned his back and walked out, showing a side of himself that no one besides Soun had ever seen, or even suspected.  
  
"Kasumi?" Kasumi looked sympathetic, but she shook her head, signaling silently that she could not, or would not, help him. Ranma sighed, and slowly left the dojo, heading for his room, so he could pack.  
  
***  
  
Akane stared at Ranma, speechless, as he finished his tale. Not meeting her gaze, he asked, "Can you ever forgive me?"  
  
"Silly boy. You didn't know. I can't hold you responsible for that."  
  
"But… the soul-bond…"  
  
"It'll regenerate. But… what will you do? You've been disowned."  
  
"I suppose I'll go stay with Ucchan for a while, or I could go back to China and search for a cure, or I could see if 'Kasan will let me stay at her place…"  
  
"You could stay here…"  
  
"How? I mean, I was kicked out after…"  
  
"Biki-chan owes me a favour."  
  
"It'd have to be a BIG favour… she hates me… and has sworn vengeance… Why?  
  
"Why does Nabiki owe me a favour?"  
  
"Why do you want me to stay so much? I mean, I'm always insulting you… and I didn't tell you about P-chan… and I've wrecked your life with all the havoc that followed me here… and I make you angry all the time… and I never spar with you… and…"  
  
"Ranma."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Shut up." She reached for his hand. "You're my fiancée. No matter what."  
  
"Really?" Ranma asked, voice full of disbelief.  
  
"Really." Ranma  
  
In a nearby room, a strain of song floated in to the kissing couple:  
  
You say, go slow; I fall behind.  
  
The second hand unwinds.  
  
If you're lost, you can look, and you will find me.  
  
Time after Time.  
  
If you fall I will catch you; I will be waiting.  
  
Time after Time.  
  
Time after Time.  
  
----------------------- [i] If anyone reading this speaks Italian could you tell me if I spelt this word correctly? Thanks.  
  
[ii] Didn't know Ryouga could do that? Let me explain my reasoning. If he couldn't keep his backpack in Hammerspace, every time he turns back into a human he would have to wander around naked until he found it or some clothing; which with his sense of direction could be a VERY long time. Not that that would be a bad thing… ;)  
  
[iii] My thanks to R. for this wonderful insult.  
  
[iv] Can't tell you where, because if you're a girl you already know, and if you're a guy there's a reason why you don't. ;)  
  
[v] Not to be confused with "Hearts of Ice" by Christa Perry  
  
[vi] A great program to use for all your accounting needs… even if it is made by Microsoft. (bastards.)  
  
[vii] Stolen from "A smile like yours" by Carly-san, one of the fics that inspired this one.  
  
[viii] Stolen from a YYH fanfic, I don't remember which right now.  
  
[ix] Yes, I'm civilized and I use metric, but it's a figure of speech. (So THERE narie! ;p ) 


End file.
